In true teacher fashion I'm going to provide some background knowledge that you'll need in order to fully understand this blog.
Color Code: This is a personality test and here are the descriptions of each personality type.
Lemon Law: A law that Barney Stinson invented where people should be able to "Lemon Law" dates if they know within 5 minutes that it's a no go. No hurt feelings, just "Lemon Law" and move on.
All right, I think we're ready...
I met a guy on Tinder. Katie, when are you going to grow up and stop trying to date via Tinder. Noted.
The Grocer and I text back and forth for quite some time. That's what we're calling him, The Grocer. Julie gave him that name. That's longer than I'm comfortable texting because I think it's super lame to get all wrapped up in conversations with people you might see and decide within 30 seconds, Lemon Law.
We kept trying to set up plans and something always got in the way. After several weeks of texting, I was O-V-E-R it. "Sir, you have completely lost my interest. Bye." However, he kept persisting and persisting so I, reluctantly, decided to meet him.
No Lemon Law needed! He was much more attractive than I had anticipated! That's such a nice surprise when it comes to online dating. I'm always nervous about what guys will think of me as well but he said, "Wow, you're even better looking than your pictures," which was nice to hear.
We totally hit it off right away. It was very all very comfortable. It's obvious that he's a very kind-hearted guy. He asked lots of questions, really listened to my answers, very much a giver.
After a while, we were hanging out at my house one night and he looks around and says, "Your house is very...in order. It's like everything has a place."
LPIMH: Yes, welcome to the first glimpse into my Type A personality.
Type A? Are you sure? Did you show him your laundry?!
Organized disaster.
I said, "Yes, everything does have a place. That's the red in my personality. Have you ever taken the Color Code Test?" You could have knocked me over when he said, "Actually I have."
"What? Nobody ever says yes to that question."
He said he had to take it for work and that he was white/yellow.
LPIMH: White/yellow? Eeek. I'm red/blue. Do opposites REALLY attract?
I replied that I was polar opposite.
He said he couldn't really understand "red people." "I mean, why do they have to want to be so successful? I could care less about money or advancing in my career."
LPIMH: Well, my erection is gone. The only acceptable performance level is the highest one possible. And that's why you're not married. Stop working and get a !@#$ing life Katie. Also noted.
He said, "So, what do you do for fun?" Sidenote: Nothing makes me feel like a bigger loser than when guys (or anyone for that matter) ask me what I do for fun.
Mentally scrolling through the past six months for the "fun" things I've done.
LPIMH: Written a professional development?
Created a new matrix to coach teachers?
Written the 6th Grade district math curriculum?
Paid someone to re-do my blog?
Binge-watched Season 4 of OITNB?
Yes, yes, I need to get a life.
I told him I hike, I bike, I go out with my friends and I like to read books.
He told me he's never read a whole book.
LPIMH: Erection completely dead. If you're new to this blog or new to me, in general, Talk Nerdy to Me will tell you what turns me on...and off.
However, he has read 44 of the 66 books in the Bible.
That night he talked a LOT more about Jesus. He talked about how he wanted to be a Pastor, how he wished that the world was like it was long ago and how sad our world is now. He quoted the Bible forty six times. Katie! Did you really count? Ok, maybe it wasn't forty-six but it, very well, could have been.
It was all, in the words of my friend, a little more religion that I'm comfortable with but we went out a few more times. Jesus became, not just one of the topics of conversation but the ONLY topic of conversation.
In the end, I let Jesus win The Grocer. I think he might be better suited to a good Christian choir singer and not a curse-word wielding, book reading, fiery red, Jack Catholic (is that a thing? a Jack Catholic, like a Jack Mormon?).
And so the dating continues...
