Dear Red Box,
I think you're a stupid idea.  Because of your "Just $1 a day" policy, I have just been charge $32 for the same freaking 2 movies.  One may say it's my fault for being so irresponsible as to not return movies for so long, but I blame you.

Dear Tom and Danielle,
Are you sure you want to trust me with your children for 3 nights?  See above for my responsibility level.  I will do my personal best to remember to feed your children, keep clothes on them and remember to retrieve them from school...but I make so promises. 


Dear Jetta,
I GET IT!  YOU NEED SERVICE!  You can turn off the little wrench blinky thing now.  




Dear Crossfitters Who Started Way After Me and Always Beat Me,
Stop it.  You're making me look bad.




Dear Newly Manicured Hands and Feet,
I love you!


Dear Banfield Vet,
No, I don't want you to biopsy the bump on my dog's leg for over $100.  Why don't you go ahead and use your vet skills to tell me that it's probably a wart or nothing to worry about?




Dear Best Friend,
Hmm, I'm not sure what to say about this gift that just came in the mail for me: