I give full credit to http://www.littlemissmomma.com/ for coming up with this idea. I actually think her friend came up with it. Nonetheless. I heart it and I will steal it because I think that if I read someones blog on a regular basis, we're friends so she won't care. However, if you're bored of my blog, go and look at hers. She a professional (unlike myself and my ametuer (I can't get the red line to go away. That means I spelled that word so wrong that the computer can't even tell what I was trying to write. Oh well, I give up. am-eh-chure, in case you didn't know either) status) and funny and fun and has super cute crafty projects...but I digress.

Here are a few Awkward and Awesome (I've noticed that I just capitalize anything I feel "deserves" a capital letter, such as awkward and awesome, don't tell my students I don't follow the capitalization rules) things that keep me on track.

Let's start with Awkward...because it's more fun and I know all of you enjoy laughing at my mishaps.

Awkward Things that Keep Me on Track
Every morning I put the blowdryer under my chin so it blows all of my hair back and I feel like a supermodel for a few minutes...until I turn off the blowdryer. When I'm feel low, I do it for longer. How does it keep me on track? Because. When my face is fat I don't feel supermodely so I can't have that.


I do "the check" every morning as well. I used to check my stomach by sitting down to see if there were any rolls. I secretly likes the tiny skin rolls but if it rolled like there was fat, it was a bad day. Now, I'm older and not a size 5 so I already know what the answer will be if I do that check. I, instead, do the back check. How far do I have to bend to make a back roll? Is is there when I am just standing? BAD DAY. Do I have to really bend back? EXCELLENT DAY.


Can I feel my hip bones? I don't know why but I wasn't blessed with wide hips (ps. that might be another "awkward." I want big hips and I could care less if my booty gets bigger. Are you singing Sir-Mix-A-Lot right now too?) Anyway, if I'm about to got to sleep and can feel my hip bones well, I'm doing fine. If not, it's time to move my arse, er...hips. PS. I know this picture doesn't really fit but those ARE his hips and that IS all I watched when I saw Fight Club so I think it fits.


And a few Awesomes...
I LOVE cinnamon and I found these Cinnamon Almonds with, only, 1 gram of sugar per serving. I crush them and put them in my oatmeal. DELICIOUS!



I have to stay healthy because I don't excel at many things but I am a damn good aunt. You're not seeing the how being healthy equates to being a good aunt? Is it because I wanna live a healthy life and be able to run around with them? No, it's much more vain than that. I hate being in pictures with my niece and nephew when I am insecure and since I see them all the time, I have to keep it up. PS. I know that Lumberjack sweater isn't the girliest thing ever. I blame the mother of these perfect children because I said, "Bring me a sweater and that's what she gave me."




And there you have it. What are the awkward and awesome things that keep you on track?!?

It's no secret that I love sugar. Love. This makes me think of that Friends episode when Phoebe is dating the psychologist and he says, "It's just food, Monica, not love." "It's just sugar, Katie, not love."

Let me just tell you about the worst of my addiction to that refined poison...during my 1st year of teaching (which was the 2nd most stressful time EVER) my daily routine, after school (and sometimes at lunch too-did I really just admit that??), was to get a Diet Coke and a Twix bar out of the vending machine. You know how the commercial for Twix bar makes them look like a "pause" button? Well, where the hell was the pause button during my gluttonous overdose of a year of bad decisions and a TWENTY (yes, you read correctly) pound weight gain?!?!




Fast forward to the next time I ODed, big time. I moved to Durango...the fittest city in the world. These people worked out and ate healthy like it was their job. The guy I used to work with biked to school every day...even when it was 8 degrees. WTF?! EIGHT DEGREES. I didn't even want to walk to my car, let alone bike to my job. So, all of the Durangans were kayaking, hiking, jogging, biking, rock climbing, cross country skiing. I was driving, not biking (even though that's pretty much how everyone else gets there) to Bread...for the cookies that were as big as my face. This happened a lot. Strong work Cartier.



So, as I began getting healthier, because it was either that or slit my wrists (and probably watch refined sugar pour out of my veins), I did some research. Since I pretty much have a PhD in Googling, I Googled.


Major things that cause sugar/caffeine (caffeine is in this category as well) cravings:
1. High stress
Your body doesn't care whether you're stressed because you're being chased by a shark (in which case I would hope I wouldn't stop for the Twix but I'm not convinced) or because of the day-to-day BS. SOLUTION: Realize you're getting stressed and: breathe, meditate, chew gum, whatever it takes to keep the garbage out of your body because the last thing you need when you're stressed is for your jeans to not button.


2. Inflammation
This sounds weird, but it's true. However, it can me the normal inflammation like injury or something or allergens. So, if you are allergic to everything, as I am (I'm not freakin' kidding. They put 80 "allergens" on my and I was allergic to 73 of them, Holy Shnikees!) you'll be affected. SOLUTION: Take your allergy pills or stay away from things you're body hates you for putting in/near it.


3. Low blood sugar.
That means when you don't eat enough, your blood sugar gets low and you crave sugary snacks. SOLUTION: Eat every 3 hours. NEVER let more times than that pass and make sure that each time you eat there's some protein in the mix.


4. Not Enough Sleep
This is not a problem for me but some people getting enough sleep is a tough task. SOLUTION: turn off your computer (ahh, the irony as I type this as midnight) and drift off into dreamland. Sidenote: I had to put this adorable picture of my sweet, sweet niece sleeping like a baby.



5. Eating Dirty
This is the opposite of "eating clean." So, if you're putting food that has been altered (think: almost everything that's in the aisles of the store), you're going to be craving more of that dirty food. SOLUTION: Detox. Some people don't agree with these but I do. People have said, "Our bodies are built to process this and we don't need to do them." I say, "No, our bodies were NOT built to process chemically enhanced, processed food. So, for that reason we need to "eat clean" and when we don't (cause nobody can do it all the time) we need to detox. In unrelated news: don't EVER Google Image: eating dirty. Ahhhh, my eyes are burning!!!


Moral of this story: I had to find my triggers and still have to work hard to realize what is going on when it's happening and then, here's the hard part, not give in to the sugar cravings.

PS. I'm not sure if I mentioned this or not but refined sugar is BAD, BAD, BAD for you. So, grab some fruit (which is not refined sugar but still sweet) and let's all sing Kumbaya. Namaste Friends.

So, I started back to the gym yesterday.

I got on the treadmill and used my C25K app on my phone which, by the way, is awesome. I mean, at first I was a bit surprised. I really thought that with an app called "Couch to 5K" it would start with something a little easier like: Day 1- Remove your ass from the couch and put on your gym clothes. Day 1 complete.

Apparently my iPhone wants to push my a little harder than that. So, Day 1-5 minute brisk walk to warm up, then alternate 60 second run, 90 second walk for 20 minutes followed by a 5 minute cool down. Not too intense. This thing is great. It tells me exactly what to do and when so I can just listen to my music.

Though, it IS a little bossy. I was hoping for a sweet, "Ok, it's time to run. Good job!" It says, in a manly military-like voice, "Run." "Walk." "Run." "Workout complete."

What?! That's it?! "Workout complete." How bout, "Way to move your ass today. I'm so impressed at your endurance (can I even use those words without laughing when I run for 60 seconds at a time). Way to only watch 2 episodes of Khloe and Lamar and not 12!" So, I need more accolades than most. Oh well, I guess I'll have to call my friends for those because apparently Mr. Drill Sargent voice on Couch to 5K won't be giving it to me.

Today...Day 2 of C25K.

"I'm ready for another blog. You only posted once in May." I'm sure you can imagine my surprise when I got this text from my cousin. I mean, on one hand, she's family so she's practically required to say that but I was so stoked that someone reads it! Yes! Mission accomplished.

So, now I just have to think of something to write about...

What I really wanna write about is the most recent date I went on because I'm way funnier when I'm making fun of someone, but I fear he would find this blog and have his feelings hurt, and while I don't mind making fun of people behind their backs, making grown men cry is never something to brag about. So, I'll give it to you in a nutshell: super nice, cute, did all the right things, and I'm just not that in to him. Why? Why, you ask? Because I'm an asshole, that's why...and a glutton for punishment (and singlehood, apparently).

And that's what I have for today. I promise I'll be a better blogger soon.

I love this and perhaps I should morph my blog into this:

So...the losing the weight part wasn't that tough...it's the whole, "You're going to have to maintain these eating habits for the rest of your life," thing that's a little tougher.

I'm doing it already..."Well, I shouldn't grab fast food on the way home...but I lost some weight so it won't really hurt." "No sugar Katie...but I lost some weight so it won't really hurt." "I should only eat a handful of popcorn...but I lost some weight so a bit more won't hurt." YES IT WILL!




So, I need to get back on track and that's what I'm doing...starting tomorrow, just kidding, starting today, now.

Goals for the summer:
1. Get into ALL of my old shorts and no only have them button but have them button WITHOUT the muffin-top. "Just because they button, doesn't mean they fit."
2. Run.
3. Eat frozen grapes-frozen grapes NOT popsicles.
4. Swim...that means swim laps not lay on a raft in the pool.

"Find something you love to do and then it won't feel like working out." The quote I heard over and over and over. Each time I imagined punching the person (usually someone with a perfect body) who said it.

Says Mr. Triathlete, "I just LOVE running. It's so addicting. If I don't do it, I don't feel good." (Imagining myself kicking him in his fit little shins)

Says Mrs. Swim Master, "Swimming makes me feel so good. I just get in the pool and go and I go for miles and miles." (Imagining myself snapping her goggles on her head)

Says Ms. Bikram Yoga, "It's like a drug. I just do it because I HAVE to do it, for me." (Imagining myself forcing her to put her face on that sweat-filled floor)

I'm that girl now. I LOVE hiking. It IS like my drug. For me, it is a whole body experience. Mind, body, and soul. I'm so glad I found something that I enjoy doing. I love that I can do it with friends and socialize (one of my all-time favorite things to do) or do it by myself and have just as much fun. People on the mountain are always happy and positive which makes for great surroundings. The dessert in bloom is, quite possibly, one of the most beautiful sites in the world.



The time of day and my mood determine my playlist, and I just cruise. Sunrise hikes, in the morning make me feel closer to God, and my mom, and my grandma. (No, this isn't a commercial for the Catholic church, you're still on the right channel). Afternoon hikes help me clear my head after a day of putting new thoughts in there. As I hike, I get to be with just me, my music and my thoughts. By the time I'm done, my head it clear, I feel like I've sweated out tons of toxins and I have a ton of energy.



This has been, by far, my best hiking season yet. I put in more miles than I ever have, and I saw so much progress in myself. I went faster. I could go further without stopping. I had more endurance. And each time it got easier.

Are you that person imagining yourself poking holes in my Camelbak? I would be so excited if that were the case because that would mean I'm making at least one person think...or just making them nauseous. Either way, YEAH!

I love the concept of a Bucket List. I made one when I was 13 and still have it somewhere but thought I'd make my online version. I bet a forgot a ton of things...but here's what I have so far.



What's on your Bucket List? Any that are the same as mine? Let's start crossin' shit off these things!

http://www.bucketlist.org/list/Kcartier/