Journey to the Healthiest Version of Me

Gratitude Lately...30 posts, Part 1

8:12 PM

Dating Continues...Jesus for the Win

8:13 PM

In true teacher fashion I'm going to provide some background knowledge that you'll need in order to fully understand this blog.

Color Code: This is a personality test and here are the descriptions of each personality type.

Lemon Law: A law that Barney Stinson invented where people should be able to "Lemon Law" dates if they know within 5 minutes that it's a no go. No hurt feelings, just "Lemon Law" and move on.

All right, I think we're ready...

I met a guy on Tinder. Katie, when are you going to grow up and stop trying to date via Tinder. Noted.

The Grocer and I text back and forth for quite some time. That's what we're calling him, The Grocer. Julie gave him that name. That's longer than I'm comfortable texting because I think it's super lame to get all wrapped up in conversations with people you might see and decide within 30 seconds, Lemon Law.

We kept trying to set up plans and something always got in the way. After several weeks of texting, I was O-V-E-R it. "Sir, you have completely lost my interest. Bye." However, he kept persisting and persisting so I, reluctantly, decided to meet him.

No Lemon Law needed! He was much more attractive than I had anticipated! That's such a nice surprise when it comes to online dating. I'm always nervous about what guys will think of me as well but he said, "Wow, you're even better looking than your pictures," which was nice to hear.

We totally hit it off right away. It was very all very comfortable. It's obvious that he's a very kind-hearted guy. He asked lots of questions, really listened to my answers, very much a giver.

After a while, we were hanging out at my house one night and he looks around and says, "Your house is very...in order. It's like everything has a place."

LPIMH: Yes, welcome to the first glimpse into my Type A personality.

Type A? Are you sure? Did you show him your laundry?!

Organized disaster.

I said, "Yes, everything does have a place. That's the red in my personality. Have you ever taken the Color Code Test?" You could have knocked me over when he said, "Actually I have."

"What? Nobody ever says yes to that question."

He said he had to take it for work and that he was white/yellow.

LPIMH: White/yellow? Eeek. I'm red/blue. Do opposites REALLY attract?

I replied that I was polar opposite.

He said he couldn't really understand "red people." "I mean, why do they have to want to be so successful? I could care less about money or advancing in my career."

LPIMH: Well, my erection is gone. The only acceptable performance level is the highest one possible. And that's why you're not married. Stop working and get a !@#$ing life Katie. Also noted.

He said, "So, what do you do for fun?" Sidenote: Nothing makes me feel like a bigger loser than when guys (or anyone for that matter) ask me what I do for fun.

Mentally scrolling through the past six months for the "fun" things I've done.

LPIMH: Written a professional development?

Created a new matrix to coach teachers?

Written the 6th Grade district math curriculum?

Paid someone to re-do my blog?

Binge-watched Season 4 of OITNB?

Yes, yes, I need to get a life.

I told him I hike, I bike, I go out with my friends and I like to read books.

He told me he's never read a whole book.

LPIMH: Erection completely dead. If you're new to this blog or new to me, in general, Talk Nerdy to Me will tell you what turns me on...and off.

However, he has read 44 of the 66 books in the Bible.

That night he talked a LOT more about Jesus. He talked about how he wanted to be a Pastor, how he wished that the world was like it was long ago and how sad our world is now. He quoted the Bible forty six times. Katie! Did you really count? Ok, maybe it wasn't forty-six but it, very well, could have been.

It was all, in the words of my friend, a little more religion that I'm comfortable with but we went out a few more times. Jesus became, not just one of the topics of conversation but the ONLY topic of conversation.

In the end, I let Jesus win The Grocer. I think he might be better suited to a good Christian choir singer and not a curse-word wielding, book reading, fiery red, Jack Catholic (is that a thing? a Jack Catholic, like a Jack Mormon?).

And so the dating continues...

Kon Mari

6:47 AM

Have you heard of this book? Of course we have. We don't live under a rock. Well, if you haven't, please buy it today. Everything from the title is true. LIFE. CHANGING.

When I read it, my closet was at an all-time high for it's level of messiness. You're embarrassing. #growupkatie The weird thing was, I had recently "gotten rid of" 7 bags of clothes. It didn't matter. There was still so much crap in there.

If you're not going to read the book, here are the rules as well as my rendition of the rules. I'll admit, some of it seems a little out there. At one point she talks about thanking your clothes for serving a purpose in your life prior to discarding them. "No, Kon Mari. I'm good." She also talks about folding her socks and how it's complete blasphemy to roll them because you're being mean to them or some crazy !@#$. "Sorry socks. I'm still rolling you."

1. Dress Up

I 100% did not do this. That's weird.

2. Tidy all at Once

This was essential. I took a week and just did it. It stressed me out every day because the house got ridiculously messy before it got clean but it totally made sense when I was finished.

3. Tidy by Category

I think this might be one of the most important pieces. Kon Mari says that we have similar items in lots of locations. I found out I had tweezers in six locations-my purse, my make-up area, my make-up bags under the sink, my nail area, and in drawers. Eleven pairs of tweezers. Wtf? Thus, the reason, you have to take everything out that's in that category. ALL SHIRTS. ALL PANTS. Not just "your closet."

My hardest section was photos and memories but that's why she has you do it last. Honestly, towards the end nothing brought be joy because I was so effing sick of this that it was easy to discard.

4. Put Everything on the Floor
I didn't really see the point of this, at first. Why did I need to go the extra steps to move everything from the closet to the Living Room? I did though. It's so much easier to make a decision when it's out of your closet. It was also rather enlightening to see my shirts stacked on the couch in multiple piles taller than me.

5. Hold Each and Every Item

Another "rule" that seemed odd but turned out to be essential. You really do need to hold them to see if they "spark joy in your life." Does it spark joy is my go-to question all the time now.

Does that dress I'm about to buy spark joy? No? Put it back.

Does that food spark joy? No? Don't buy it? You'll just let it go bad in your fridge.

Does that man you're going out with spark joy? No? Put him back.

6. Focus-No Music. No Netflix.

This was also hard. I need something in the background! However, it really did help me get fully in to the method.

7. Discard All, Then Organize.

Oh my gosh. After having all my clothes in the middle of the Living Room for two full days, I wanted to rip my hair out. However, it made sense to discard all of it and then organize.

This also says that you should get rid of the bags right away when you're done. Just after clothes were done, I had SEVEN big, black garbage bags. At first I put them all in my garage closet to save for a garage sale. When would I have the sale? Ugh, that seemed like so much work to get it all back out of the bags, price it and watch it go again. After a week, I took them all out, threw them in the car, dropped them off at Salvation Army Donation (PSA: Much better than GoodWill. They are much more honest with their money. Look it up.) It felt so good to get rid of that stuff once and for all.

Kon Mari even has a VERY SPECIFIC method of folding. With shirts, you're supposed to fold them so they line up like spines of a book. When it was done, it totally made sense but I still have to watch the youtube video every time to remember how to do it, ~~so I haven't folded my clothes in three months~~ so I need to keep practicing.

8. Thank your Belongings.

This is weird but I did it. "Thank you old and stained Ugg Boots. I once loved you." I didn't want the Kon Mari Karma Gods to come after me. I guess I get it, especially if you're someone who gets attached to things.

Things I Learned...

My life is much calmer when I have less stuff

Keeping my bathroom clean is so much easier because I have one brush...because that's all I need. You're crazy. I need six brushes-a wet hair brush, one for my purse, a round brush, two paddle brushes and a normal brush. No. One brush.

I still need to finish.

I kinda went out of order and haven't done all kitchen things yet. My summer project. Take three days and finish my Kon Mari clean out.

I need less stuff

Does your floor look like a bomb went off half the time? It's not your fault...but you do have WAY too much stuff.

I Can Breathe

When I don't have messes to worry about, I can concentrate on other things. Imagine that.

Kon Mari Works

Buy the book. Read it. Do it...and follow all the rules, dammit! Tell me about it

In Case You're Keeping Score

5:46 PM

Thanks Dad

8:30 AM

Timothy, it's impossible to buy gifts for you for multiple reasons, so I'm not going to try this year.  Here's your gift...

I think our lives are made up of the little moments, not the big ones. 

Like the time you bought twenty-five turkeys for families in need or lunch on the patio where we were arguing and sorting through our crap at the same time or the day we spent painting at the house.  I watched you share the ice cream cone with your grandkids because grandpas get to give kids ice cream for breakfast if they want.  Those moments, those are my favorite.  It was nothing big or huge, just daily life and daily conversations.  Sometimes those moments come in the form of interaction and sometimes they are just the things we notice about other people.

Dad, thank you for teaching me about accepting other people...all people.  You never really mentioned it but I watched you and learned.  It's where I learned the most.

You were great with finances, so I learned that I shouldn't spend what I don't have.  Ok, you also mentioned that one a few several hundred times as well.  

You read and researched and learned, so I learned to do that too.  You shared articles.  You asked if I had seen this or that.  Thank you for constantly teaching me.  

When people needed help you were the first one to help out, so I learned that we always lend a hand.  Almost all of the memories, I have, of us being at other people's houses involved you, at some point, fixing something.  You said you got good at fixing things because you're good at breaking them but, really, you're just a good guy.  

When things were broken you fixed them right away, so I learned that we take care of our things and don't leave them ruined.  Oh the smell of Home Depot, to this day, screams "Childhood."  Hours and hours were spent in that store looking for the right tools or perfect piece of wood or certain sized screws. 

If you didn't know something you learned, so I learned that we don't need to know all the answers we just need to know where to find them.  I was always fascinated by men who were unwilling to ask for directions.  Your confidence is apparent when you are willing to ask anyone for assistance.  

You worked hard at your job and were so good at it so I learned to take pride in my work.  I loved hearing about how much people loved working for my dad.  I guess when I was young I thought everyone was great at their jobs but that's not true.  Thanks for being the perfect mix at work-a man people loved to work for as well as kicking ass and taking names to surpass your quota every year. 

You were on time for everything, so I learned that it's important to value other people's time and be on time too.  I still remember you meticulously quoting times for our arrival to others.  We will be there in 14 minutes...and we were.  I thought you had magic powers.

You gave to others, without a second thought, so I learned that we should give when and what we can.  Oh how many times I watched you buy things for or donate to others without ever even mentioning it.  It's almost like giving gets cheapened when we talk about it but you didn't talk about it, you just did it.  In fact, had I not been paying very close attention, I'm not sure I would have known just HOW much you were giving...but I was watching.  

You couldn't carry a tune to save your soul so I learned...eh, some things I learned from Mom ;) 

Happy Father's Day to you Dad!  I love you so very, very much.