I'm Ready for the Olympics

9:10 AM

So, I'm just starting a new "journey." I joined Crossfit and I'm doing a 6 month challenge.

In a nutshell: I workout, hard. I eat right. Every aspect of my life improves.


So, now I just have to make that happen.

If you're a regular follower, you know I've been to Crossfit 480 a few times but now I, essentially, have 3 trainers watching my every move...3 good looking, super fit trainers making sure I'm doing it right.

And let me tell you, there isn't much that is more motivating that knowing you have to "report" to 3 men AND, here's the worst part. They're all super, super nice. You would think that people with bodies that are that rocked would be rude and condescending but they're not. They're encouraging and nice.

I feel like that's even more motivating. They're not Jillian Michaels yelling at me to pull it together, but I don't know what's going on in their heads so I have to do my best to ensure they're thoughts of me don't suck.

#1-College Friend
He is in charge of making sure I'm eating right.
He's an organic chef. In college he was an organize Adios Mother Fucker drinker, but has since changed his ways.

He and his beautiful wife eat organic, look organic, are organic.

I wish you could see the look I have on my face as I looking into my coffee cup that still has the FFVCC (Fat free vanilla Coffeemate Creamer) in it which is, neither, organic nor without any refined sugar.

He's going to be on me about what I'm putting into my body as well as the teacher for my T/Th Crossfit classes. It's gonna suck, but I'll be there every Tuesday and Thursday.

#2-I'll call him Family Man
I think he might be in charge of my measurements or something. PS. The thought of having someone/anyone measure me is worse than the thought of a root canal. He says, "I'll take your measurements, body compisition and before pictures." I hear, "I'm going to poke this hot stick in your eye, stomp on your face, and then kill you."


"Are you ready? How are you feeling? You're doing good, but we're going to help make you great." As these words are coming out of his mouth, in walks his wife (who looks like she belongs on the cover of a magazine) and his baby daughter (equally as beautiful). They're the cutest family ever, which I almost never say because I think my brother's family took that title long ago, but they definitely rival them.

Again, you'd think they'd be super serious but they're bantering back and forth about which side of the blanket goes on the ground for the baby.

A blog for another day: Why men don't understand things women do. He keeps putting the wrong side of the blanket on the ground and she says, "Flip it over." I am watching all of this unfold thinking, of course flip it over. She always plays on the other side which means one side has been touching the gym floor all the time and she's a baby and needs to play on the clean side of the blanket. He doesn't get that...because he's a man and men don't think like that.

#3-Edward Norton. In charge of my Elements classes and helps me run
When a guy whose back puts Edward Norton's, circa American History X, (but minus the swastikas) to shame says, "I'll be at the track at 6:30 am on Saturday morning. You don't have to come. It would probably be a good idea but you don't have to," you go.

And if you're me, you can't sleep the night before because you're scared of:
A. Being late
B. Dying while you're there

By the way, I went. It was actually really good. I totally didn't die. He had us (me and Boomer, the other guy on the 6th month challenge with me). Run 100, walk 100, run 100, walk 100 x 4. Then we did 4 sprints. It was a bit tough but I could breathe. However, as Boomer and I are huffing and puffing our way through this work-out Edward Norton is sprinting like a gazelle on the other side of the track...and then lapping us.


He also took me through the Elements class, which is 3 classes with one of the owners where they teach you to lift weights like you're going to the Olympics.

Put your feet in Position 1 and your arms in Deadlift position and slightly bend your knees and make your chest big. PS. He kept saying, "Make your chest big," and all I could think was, that won't be happening without some surgery. Now lift a bit past your knees and pop it off your chest and into the air. Holy hell! So much to remember!

As I'm doing these things I am seriously having visions of, "Next us in the Weighlifting competition for the 2012 Summer Games, is Katie Cartier." My fans are going wild cheering me on. And then, I walk up to the bar, get into Position 1 (or was it Power Position?), concentrate, and put the bar with the gigantic weights up over my head. A perfect 10. Yes that was my vision. In reality the weights look huge but only weigh 5 lbs. But I did put it over my head so I am a champion, even if it's only in my own little mind.



So...I'm done with Elements, on to the real workouts.

PS. My entire core is sore today, good sore, not I-can't-move-sore. I think running does my body good. Now, say a prayer that I don't have my annual ankle sprain any time soon.

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