A Day of S!@#
6:12 PMThat's all I'm asking...
ONE. DAY. OF. SHIT.
Can we please get ONE day where everyone on Facebook just posts the shit in their lives? I'm SO tired of looking at this glossy, filtered posts.
I got a new job!
We took a great vacation!
My kids are so cute!
Here are some amazing words of wisdom that spoke to me!
Watch how well I can craft sentences and make them sound beautiful!
I'm skinny!
My face doesn't have any wrinkles!
No, that's not what your posts actually say but we can all read between the lines.
Let's get real for God sakes!
Now, before you pinch me with those fake posting fingers, you have to know I'm totally talking to myself too! I'm a card carrying member of the "humble brag" at times and you know if I call you out, I'll call me out too.
Let me translate my last few posts into what was really happening or what I was really saying...
What I meant: Look at all the books I've read recently. Be proud.
What I meant: Look how skinny I was.
What I really meant: I do a Book Club with my nephew and I want you to know.
What I really meant: I make videos for my school.
What I really meant: Look at my big family. Isn't that awesome?
What I meant: I have been eating like this for a month but if I post it and it's a meme, it's funny. I hope people write that they've been eating like shit too so I don't feel bad about myself.
Yep, I do it too but since we're gettin' real in this post, lemme tell you, I kinda wanted to go through my feed and grab a ton of other people's posts, throw them up here and blast 'em. You're such a b!@#$ Kathryn and that last sentences was a total run on. #growupkatie. Yeah, you right.
But, for real...Can we puh-lease, for one day, post what's actually happening because the "try and make things look perfect" kinda makes me wanna hurl. Guess what? Your life isn't fucking perfect and none are the rest of ours are either!
Did you lose your !@#$ at work? Tell us!
Did you raise your hand to actually punch your kid before, quickly, realizing you could go to jail for that? Tell us!
Have you watched Netflix for 16 hours straight and began melting into your couch? Tell us!
Posting a picture of your workout? Do it, and then tell us how it's the first time you've moved your ass since May!
Are you the world's worst homemaker and eat out more than you cook for your family? Tell us!
Haven't bathed your children in days? They smell like a mixture of dirt and syrup? Tell us!
Have you fantasized about pulling a Loraina Bobbit on your husband? Tell us!
I'm not saying we should all vent all over and play whoa was me to the general public, but can we please mix it up a bit and when you do brag, just go ahead and throw a little: #humblebrag up there.
LET'S. GET. REAL. Still be funny...but real.
Thoughts?
PS. In case you kinda liked this post but would like to read a much nicer and less cussy version of it, I wrote Greener Grass years ago and it pretty much says the same thing in MUCH more flowery words.
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