In an effort to document every step of this journey, I'm writing a blog...

I have started the foster licensing process because I have been thinking about it for quite a while and a particular situation has arisen where a baby, who will be born in the beginning of April can't stay with his/her (I don't know if it's a boy or girl yet) parents and I'm first on the list as kinship placement*.  

FYI, this baby does not belong to my brother or anyone in my immediate family.

If that's the case and I'm offered the baby, I would take him/her, and then if parental rights were severed, I would apply to adopt the baby.  

*Because of privacy laws, that's really all I can say right now I think.


Answers to Your Questions
You're gonna have a baby in less than two months?
If all goes as planned, yes.

Why are you sharing this now?
Because I always share and I figure, if you know, you'll send all your positive energy my way and I want it all!

When will you know if you get the baby?
When they call me and say, there's a baby here, come and pick him/her up or I'm dropping him/her off.

Oh my gosh, so how do you prepare?
Well, it's tricky.  I have to be ready to have a newborn in my home because I'll literally have a few hours between the phone call and the time I get him/her.

At the same time, while I'm pretty sure this is going to happen, there are no guarantees.

Also, I have a lot of people praying for me right now but could use as many prayers and positive thoughts as I can get.

Are you excited?
So very, very excited.

Are you nervous it might not happen?  
A little bit...but I'm more nervous that it will and I'll have a newborn in less than two months.  




Are you second guessing your decision? 
You know when something just feels right?  Like, when every single bone in your body is telling you it's what you need to be doing?  I'm there.  No second guessing.  Not for a second.

Should you make sure you don't get "too excited" about this in case it doesn't happen?
No.  That's never how I live my life.  When I want something, I go all in and if it happens to not happen, I won't be any less sad that I would have been if I had pretended it might not happen.

Working with kids at school and having kids of your own is very different. 
That's not a question there Ace.

And, also, I know!  There's no cafeteria to cook for my kid at home.  Maybe I can just keep him/her at school and run them through the lunch line?

Don't you want to have "your own" baby?
If by "my own" you mean would I like to be pregnant someday. My answer is, "Sure."  That is something I have always envisioned for myself and that hasn't changed.  If by "my own," you mean a kid that feels more "real" than this baby coming, I say...


What if the parents take the baby back? 
That would be devastating and hard but it would also mean they've done an extraordinary amount of work to make that happen.



Things you're saying behind my back:  
Kids born addicted to drugs could have big problems.  They can have health problems or behavioral problems. 
I know.

I don't think she really understands what she's taking on. 
Maybe not but what do we do when that happens?  We figure it out.

Wow.  I would never.
That's ok.  You don't have to ;)

Words for you:
To the people who are scared for me: 
Don't be scared.  I'm a thinker, a researcher, a lover, a planner, and a very strong woman.  Best of all, I am blessed to have an army of people in my tribe who good, bad, or ugly, support me and that's what we always need right?  To be wrapped up in love no matter what.

To the people who are proud of me: 
Don't be.  My decision is selfish and giving, perhaps, in equal measures.

To the people who are excited for me.
Yes. Be that.