I'm writing a public service announcement to all of the past, present and future women I know and a friend or two (or five) I know who is most recently going through "a thing."  Sidenote:  It's always "a thing" these days.  It's not a break-up.  It's not dating.  It's just a thing or you're engaged.  Sadly, this is actually very true.  Also, I guess this is for men too.  Do they get sad too? #iknownothingaboutmen

Moving on...

As it turns out, there are only two ways that relationship go:
1.  They end.
2.  You get married and stay together forever.

I guess that can seem depressing but when you think about how many people there are in the world and how many matches can be made, most people are bound to go through several (or, in my case, many more than several).  

There is no other option that doesn't fit into one of those categories.  Yes, I'm oversimplifying but...well, no buts.  I'm oversimplifying and for the purposes of this blog I need to do just that.

So, this is for everyone who is dealing with #1...

One of the personality traits that I hate the most is a martyr.
"Poor me.  Everything bad happens to me.  Wahhh.  Whyyyyyyyyyy don't relationships ever work out for me?
Boo.  Stop!  Put on your big girl panties and suck it up sister!

Annnnnd as much as I hate that, we all go there sometimes.

You know what else we, as women, do?  We look desperate.  I mean, not me.  I've never done anything desperate or martyrish (insert eye roll from every friend I have).  We need to stop!  We are strong and beautiful women.  PULL.  IT.  TOGETHER.  LADIES.  

I know it hurts.
It hurts when a seven year relationship...
or a fifteen year relationship...
or a six month "thing" ends.
Yes, I know there are varying degrees of hurt but we can agree that it all hurts.
Go ahead and be sad.
Cry.
Be sad.
Lay in your bed.
Be mad.
Look at your phone.
Be sad.
Re-read old texts.
Be mad.
Listen to sad songs that remind you of him.
Be sad.
Stalk away.
Then, let it go.


Get up and move the eff on.
You will.
You did last time your heart was broken and the time before that and remember that boy who broke your heart in junior high?  You're ok from that one too.   You actually see pictures of him and his wife and kids and smile and think, "Awe, I'm glad he's happy."
You will this time too.
Give it the time it needs but know that there is another side to this yucky heartache.

He wasn't your lobster.  

It's hard to really feel that when you're deep in it but as you pull away and "get better," you can look back and kinda chuckle to yourself and, "Well, glad that didn't work out."

Chin up, shoulders back, Baby.  You'll be just fine. <--- famous quotes from Mom

Feel free to come back to this blog next time...and the time after that until you find your lobster and you will.