Did That Just Happen?

10:46 PM

One of my favorite parts about me and something that I think helps keep me "healthy" is my ability to laugh at the ridiculous stuff that happens throughout the day. Often I'm laughing at someone else but I think it's completely justifiable because I do so much stupid shit every single day and I am CERTAIN that people are putting me other their friend's teams left and right as well.

So, at least 3 times a day I, either, think to myself or turn to someone else and say, "Did that just happen?" Sometimes there are cuss words in the middle of that sentence but the basic premise remains the same.

Example...true story.
I was in Wal-Mart. Stop there and remind yourself that ANYtime you need to a) feel better about yourself or b) laugh your ass off, go to Wal-Mart. So, I'm in Wal-Mart, with my friend, and I quietly (ok, I never talk quietly but I'm working on that) say, "Hmm, I wonder if Wal-Mart brand toilet paper is just as good as Charmin." Random woman comes up to us and says and I quote, "It is. It's the best. My husband gets hemorrhoids and they really help him. And when I have, you know (she points to her crotch) yeast infections, it's great. It doesn't leave anything behind but still gets you clean." My friend is, straight faced, looking at her. I look at my friend in the middle of this lunatic's story and then back at the woman and, through no fault of my own, start busting up laughing. Tears were streaming down my face as I thought, "Is this really effing happening?" And it was happening. It happened.

I was in a Subway, in the ghetto, across the street from my work and in walked a guy selling live turtles. He went up to each table and asked if they wanted to buy any turtles. "Did that just happen?" I said to Michelle. The best part was when I told my students about it the next day, the didn't flinch. "Yeah, Ms. Cartier, he goes in there a lot. I bought one from him once." My thought, "I'll have a roast beef sandwhich on wheat, red onions, green peppers and a baby turtle."

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